self growth podcast

Calm in Crazy Times

February 28, 2022 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Have you seen the meme that caught my eye?:

I really wish I weren’t living through a major historical event right now!

I feel that! But here is the thing I am realizing — historic events are happening on a very regular basis. We aren’t living through the first pandemic (nor will it be the last). This isn’t the first time we have had political upheaval and polarization (nor will it be the last). This isn’t the first time an unpredictable war has rocked a nation (and unfortunately, it won’t be the last).

I could go on and on. But you get the point. We are living through historic events. As have others, through every other historic event.

Sometimes, I wonder how future generations will look back on us, what we are going through, and how we went through it. Will they believe they could have done better? Will they think we learned anything? I wonder….

We get caught up in worrying about events all around us. And that can lead to anxiety, frustration, and inaction. Nothing changes.

As a client told me years ago, “Its not like I’m not doing anything! I am worrying!” My client felt like that was doing something. Indeed, her brain was spinning. But nothing was changing. Nothing was happening.

How DO you find calm in these crazy times? We talk about it in this episode of the Thriveology Podcast. Listen below.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

Finding Compassion

February 21, 2022 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Over the past 7 episodes, we have been building our Thrive Code. The code to follow that allows us to thrive, and also the code that runs your system, like computer code. And we are closing in on the finish line!

We bring the series to an end in this episode. The final piece of the Thrive Code is all about how we feel about others. Do we see others as “other” or as connected to us? Do we use compassion or do we objectify?

I have a built in belief that we are born with compassion. Babies and children have a natural compassionate response to others in pain. But many times, people are taught to not have a compassionate response. We are taught beliefs about why others are having problems. Often, those beliefs are based in blame and condemnation.

It is no surprise, then, that we are living in a compassion crisis. Both in terms of compassion for others and self-compassion.

Is there a way back? Yes! And it starts with understanding exactly what compassion is, where it comes from, why we lose it, and how we can cultivate it. Learn more in this episode of the Thriveology Podcast.

Listen below.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

What’s Your Challenge??

July 26, 2021 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Are you up for a challenge?

In the last episode of my podcast, I discussed how to hold on when life is tough. That’s when life is challenging you.

But what about when life isn’t so challenging… where life is copacetic? Just cruising.

It’s my observation that we work hard to keep life flat. We work hard to keep things smooth. Cold out? Turn on the heater. Hot out? Turn on the A/C. Keep things even… even-keeled. Flat.

We spend LOTS of energy to save the energy of dealing witb challenges, big or small.

But does that help (or harm) us? Does it keep us safe or make us fragile?

What if taking on small challenges actually gets us better prepared for bigger challenges? What if making choices to expand into life helps us deal with life encroaching upon us?

One of my “things” is to find little challenges for myself… new things to try, new activities to do, new tastes or sounds to take in, and new ways to try life.

How about you? What challenges are you taking on right now?

Listen to this episode of the Thriveology Podcast to discover the power of a challenge.

RELATED RESOURCES
Learning and Life
Ways to Expand
Growth Mindset
Lessons in Jiu Jitsu
Book: Thrive Principles

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

5 Lessons from 55 Trips Around the Sun

March 22, 2021 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Another year has passed. I added a year to when I answer, “How old are you?” Well, at least in theory. I am an unreliable narrator for reporting my age. By accident. But on a repeated basis.

That said, as I recorded this episode of the podcast, and write these words, I am celebrating 55 trips around the sun (and I complain I don’t get to travel much!).

I’m not sure about claiming wisdom, but I do claim some lessons from those years. Lessons I keep learning and relearning. Lessons I must remind myself about. But lessons that matter to my life.

While there are quite a few, 5 seemed to be appropriate for 55 years. 5 lessons from 55 years on this earth!

I’d love to hear the lessons you’ve learned! And I’d love to hear any questions or thoughts you might have about thriving. But until then, listen in on the 5 lessons I have learned (and keep learning), and let me know if they are lessons you share.

Listen below.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

Your Heaven on Earth

February 22, 2021 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

It is so easy to get pulled into threats and dangers, mishaps and mistakes. It is wired into our brain to have a focus on the negative. Which is too bad. That means we are more likely to miss the good moments, the highlights of life, in favor of the down moments. We clearly see the negative, but can miss the positive.

Unless, of course, we nurture a focus on the positive. Unless we look for those moments of “heaven on earth.”

What are your moments of heaven?

Martin Rutte spent his career helping companies enter into dialogue for transformation. He led difficult discussions so that company cultures could transform. Dialogue is a powerful tool of exploration. Which, unfortunately, is often replaced by debate in our culture. That is what happens when we stop listening, demanding our own viewpoint. Martin has worked to shift from the hell of debate to the heaven of dialogue.

And that led him to wonder what we might be able to do to shift our world in a better direction. So, he started wondering about those moments of heaven people have. What were the moments? What was common to those moments? How might those moments become a more intentional part of life? What if that process starts expanding those moments for more people? Might culture and society transform?

In this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, Martin gets me to discuss my moment of heaven on earth… and how I might bring that moment more into my own life. We discuss the power of three simple questions, the power of dialogue, and the need for cultural transformation right now. In this moment. Perhaps a shift to a moment of heaven on earth?

Listen to the episode below.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

The Introvert Advantage

January 25, 2021 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Just for transparencey, I am an introvert. And for much of my life, I found that frustrating when around others. I felt like a deer in headlights. How do I start a conversation? How do I avoid not going way too deep with a conversation? And working a room? Makes me sweat, just to think about that.

But is there any advantage to the introvert? Is there a place where introversion can be a gift…an advantage?

Well, of course. But most introverts don’t really see it. We just feel the frustration of watching extroverts navigate a party easily, find success in networking, and seem to be at ease in the public.

But what if that group included some true introverts who have managed to look extroverted? And what if those really aren’t strong parameters for success, anyway?

On this episode, my guest is Matthew Pollard, serial entrepreneur, public speaker, author, and… introvert. Matthew’s recent book is about how introverts can actually have the advantage in networking.

In our conversation, Matthew does a great job of defining introversion, debunks some myths around introverts, and lays out a way for introverts to use their natural way of being into a success advantage.

Listen below.

RELATED RESOURCES:
Matthew Pollard’s Website
Go Here for the Free Chapter

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

Finding Calm in the Midst of Chaos

October 5, 2020 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

These are some crazy times, aren’t they? The world seems upside-down. A pandemic, politics, conspiracy theories… news just seems to be crazier and crazier every day.

And that can catch up with each of us, stressing us out and leaving us afraid. Which places your body and brain on constant alert.

That is exhausting.

And chaotic.

Why do those news stories and social media feeds keep us so amped up and stressed out? And how can you stay calm(er) in the midst of chaos?

In this episode of the Thriveology Podcast,

RELATED RESOURCES
Covid Pandemic Series
Dealing with Anxiety
Depression Series
Breathe Through
My Books

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

Is the Present Perfect?

September 21, 2020 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

My client was telling me about lots of struggles, difficult times, and a few positive moments. I noted, as I have many times with many clients, “It sounds like your present is perfect.”

She went silent. I was silent. But I could see her processing and struggling with my words. I sat quietly.

She finally erupted: “Perfect?!? How can you say that? After all the stuff I told you… how can you tell me that things are perfect?”

I told her, “I didn’t say great. I didn’t say it was how you wanted them to be. Only that the present is perfect.”

In that moment, I could see her gears turning… but she still couldn’t make sense of what I was saying.

How can things feel upside-down and inside-out, and be perfect?

“Perfect” does not mean preferred. It means something is complete. A perfectly cooked steak is complete. It is cooked to a certain level. But also consider a “perfect storm,” the perfect combination of circumstances that mean the storm is more powerful than when those circumstances don’t combine.

The idea of the Present Perfect, which sounds like grammar, comes from life coach, Thomas Leonard. He noted that the Present Perfect is the fact that this moment perfectly reflects everthing that has come before, up until now.

Why does that matter? We explore it in this episode of the Thriveology Podcast. Listen below

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

How to Engage in Life

August 10, 2020 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Wow! What a time in history, right? A pandemic rages. Division is pulling us apart. Sometimes, it seems easier just to crawl under a rock and hide.

But hiding isn’t the solution. And you have more to offer than hiding. You are built to engage the world, to make a difference.

Then why do we “play small”? When there should be more to life? More for YOU to do in life? More your life should be about?

That life you are thinking about… that is the Engaged Life. Living with more engagement, more depth, more meaning… more purpose.

Over the years, this has been a fairly constant refrain from clients: “There should be more to life than THIS.” There is….

Engaging in life. Being engaged in life.

Living a bit deeper… a bit wider.

Over the years, 3 P’s have emerged as the Path to living an engaged life. Those 3 P’s: Passion, Purpose, and Presence.

When you are focused on building those 3 areas, your Engaged Life builds.

In this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, I cover the 3 P’s of Living an Engaged Life. Listen below.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

6 Truths About Worry

June 22, 2020 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

How much do you worry? How often do you find yourself thinking about things that could go wrong? Things that might happen to those you love? Things that might happen to you?

Worry is a common issue for people. And sadly, worry robs us of living. It costs us lots of energy, and exposes us to fears over possible events — not actual events.

When we worry, we focus on the future, what could happen. Which draws us away from what is happening. What is happening in this moment, in actuality.

Unfortunately, for many, worry is a habit. It happens almost automatically. Worry robs people of sleep, of connection, and of presence. Many people struggle to get to sleep, worried about what might happen. Many people connect less, since they are worried about what might happen. And people are less present, since they are focused on what might happen.

There are some truths to worry that we need to understand, if we are going to turn down the “worry dial.” These truths point to why people worry, why it is a waste, and how to begin shifting away from worry.

Listen below. And in the next episode, I will share some strategies for worrying less.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS