Goodbye and Hello – Passing Through Grief

Terese CastellanosLife is a fairly constant flow of goodbyes and hellos.  Sometimes, those goodbyes are incredibly painful.  The death of a loved one, the loss of a relationship, the loss of a job or role.  All can be painful.

And sometimes, those goodbyes feel like the end of the story.  But many times, there is more.  More to the story, more to life.  More to live.  Those are the hellos.

When you are caught up in the grief of a goodbye, it may seem like a hello is impossible.  It takes courage.  Vulnerability.  A willingness to live again.

We can live behind a fortress, trying to protect ourselves from hurts.  But that also keeps us from connecting and loving… living.

Sure, the goodbyes hurt.  But that is part of the deal with life.  Sometimes, the pain breaks us open to new possibilities and new people.

In this Thriveology Podcast episode, I interview Terese Castellanos.  As a therapist, Terese helped people through losses and life struggles… and one day realized that she, herself, was faced with the same thing.  Her husband was dying.

In our interview, Terese and I look to her story of goodbye… how that felt like the end of the story… but it wasn’t.  So, we also discuss hello.  And how to live through the goodbye, open to the hello.

RELATED RESOURCES
Dealing With Grief
Lessons From A Chaplain
Lessons From A Chaplain, pt. 2
Terese’s Website

 

Letting Your Future Help Today

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Valerie Lemme, FutureVisioning

What if your “future self” can help your “current self?” And maybe even help you make sense of your “past self!”

In this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, I chat with Valerie Lemme about her journey from painful childhood and struggling adulthood to thriving. Valerie discovered that by accessing her Future Self, she could move beyond the beliefs and stuck points she was experiencing.

But in order to get there, Valerie had to go through mental, physical, and emotional pain. Through mood swings, insomnia, panic, high blood pressure, and horrible back pain, Valerie kept looking for an answer. She trained as a healer and hypnotherapist, but couldn’t find healing for herself.

On the verge of giving up, Valerie tuned into a webinar on FutureVisioning, and her life was changed. After that, Valerie decided to help others with that same process. And today, Valerie “pulls back the curtains” to share the 7 basic principles of the process.

Her principles might be a challenge to what you believe. But if what you are currently believing isn’t quite working, it might be time for a shift. Or at least some thoughts in a new direction.

Tune in as Valerie and I discuss the 7 Principles of FutureVisioning.

RELATED RESOURCES:
Responsibility
Control
Life Purpose
Future Visioning Worksheets

Emotional Potty-Training

An Interview with Rachel Kaplan

Rachel Kaplan - Emotional Potty-TrainierHow are you with your emotions?

This isn’t a question on whether you are “in touch with your emotions” or not.  It is how you process the emotions.

Some people have, well, “emotional diahrrea.”  Emotions just dump wherever and whenever.

Others have “emotional constipation.”  They just can’t get them out.  Emotions get stuck, lodged in hurtful and painful ways.

Maybe we all need a little “emotional potty training.”

When Rachel Kaplan was 14 years old, her boyfriend killed himself, leaving Rachel emotionally wounded.  She blamed herself and tried to make sense of such a tragedy at such a young age.  The emotional wound stayed with her for years.

And it led Rachel on a quest of healing.  First, she wanted to find her own healing.  But over the years, she began to use her new knowledge and skills to bring healing to others.  Trained in Western and Eastern healing approaches, Rachel began to see her work as “emotional potty training.”

She helps people who have buried their emotions deep in a “basement of shame,” which means the emotions cannot process through.  Her task is to help people to find their Authentic Self, to heal their core wounds, and discover their worth.

Listen in as Rachel and I discuss Emotional Potty Training.

RELATED RESOURCES
Discover Your Core Wound – Rachel’s Quiz
Healing Feeling – Rachel’s Podcast
Resilience
Dealing with Grief

Never Too Late (until it’s too late)

An Interview with Lorraine Hoving

Lorraine Hoving - It's never too late to changeIt’s never too late!  Until it’s too late!

We all have an expiration date!  But up until then… there is time.  But don’t take up too much time not getting there.  The sooner you do, the better your life will be, for as long as it goes on.

Isn’t that a dichotomy?  It’s never too late to make a change.  But don’t put it off!

Here’s the thing.  If there are things you have wanted to do, but haven’t… you can really be hard on yourself.  You can chastise and shame yourself for not having taken action.  All the while, you are putting it off even longer.

OR, you can decide that the moment for change is NOW.  Not “someday.”  Not “maybe tomorrow.”  Today.

On her 60th birthday, with a full day of celebration planned, Lorraine Hoving woke up in a panic.  It occured to her that if she was fortunate enough to live to 90, she was 2/3rds of the way through life.  And that was assuming she was headed for 90!

That very day, Lorraine thought about all the goals, hopes, and dreams she had… and had not yet hit.  At that point, she was overweight and hiding from life.  And on that day, she decided things had to change.

Lorraine says she took “100% responsibility for how” her life went.  She forgave herself.  She forgave others.  And she took control of her life.

Now, she is on a mission to help others build their life… they way THEY want it.  Starting now.  It’s never too late… until it’s too late.

Listen in as Lorraine Hoving and I discuss how she took control of her life and made it a life she loves.

RELATED RESOURCES:
Lorraine’s Website
Taking Responsibility
Starting Now
Forgiving
Book:  The Forgive Process

Healing From Heartbreak

An Interview with Nada Hogan

Nada Hogan, healing from heartbreakLife can turn in an instant:  a phone call, a letter, a knock on the door.  Everything you thought you knew, everything that was “normal” is pulled apart and thrown upside-down.

In that heart-stopping moment, you know life will never be the same.  And sometimes, it can feel like life isn’t just changed… but over.

For Nada Hogan, that knock on the door was a pair of police officers.  While Nada was trying to figure out what was going on, she noticed that one officer’s badge said “Chaplain.”

Nada’s 18 year old daughter had been killed in an accident.

Her already-stressed life was thrown into a tailspin.  Some days, she could barely pull herself out of bed.

Then, she decided to make a change.  To honor her daughter, Darah, in living a life of purpose.

One little step at a time, Nada pulled her life back together.  She found a connection to something bigger than herself… and eventually, to a purpose bigger than her grief.

Now, Nada helps others move through their heartbreaks to find healing.  She starts at the place where you might not even want to get out of bed.  She knows that spot!  She’s been there.

Join Nada and me as we discuss how to heal after heartbreak.

RELATED RESOURCES
Video Series – Giving Your Dreams Direction (by Nada)
Grief and Loss
Accepting What Is
Does Everything Happen For A Reason?

Your Purpose

Taking The Leap To Transformation

An Interview with Marie-Elizabeth Mali

Marie-Elizabeth Mali, Midlife Transformation SpecialistWhat happens when you do all the right things:  get the degrees, marry the “right person,” and think you are living your dream… only to discover it is someone else’s dream?

You may just push on.  You may just run away.  Or you may stop and realize that YOU are the one who needs to change… to transform.

Many times, that happens at midlife.  Call it a “crisis.”  Or call it an “opportunity for transformation.”

Marie-Elizabeth Mali decided it was time for transformation.  Having taken on what Marie-Elizabeth refers to as an “inherited identity” (the one others want for you), she realized that she was not living her authentic self.

So, she made a LEAP (which is also the acronym of her approach) to transformation.

Listen in as Marie-Elizabeth and I discuss her LEAP approach to making transformations.

RELATED RESOURCES:
Grab Marie-Elizabeth’s Resource
Learn To Show Up
Taking On Responsibility
Book:  Immutable Laws of Living

 

Living Your Engagement

The Engaged Life Series


How to live an engaged life.  Find wellness, joy, and creativity as a way of fully engaging in life.
Over the last 2 episodes, we have been talking about YOUR Engaged Life. How to build a life of passion, purpose, and presence.

Amplifying that life through gratitude, spirituality, and awe.

Here’s the thing… not to be a downer here… you and I, we are going to die.  Someday.

Likely, you don’t know when that will happen.  I don’t know when I will die.  I just know that it is in my future.

Why does that matter?

That very fact is what makes life valuable, makes TIME valuable.  If you live forever, what you do today doesn’t matter so much.  You could do it tomorrow or next year, or in a hundred years.

But knowing we only have so much time… that changes things.  We have 2 tasks:  to live as fully as we can, in the time we have… and make that time last as long as possible.

At least, that is MY task.  How can I live fully?  And how can I live fully?

If you are thinking that might be YOUR task, listen in to the podcast below.

RELATED RESOURCES
3 P’s Of Engaged Life
Amping Your Engagement
Your Thriving Body Series
Stress To Rest
Book:  The Thrive Principles

Amped Engagement: Amplifying Your Engaged Life

The Engaged Life Series

Amplifying your engaged living. How to fully engage with gratitude, awe, and a deep spirituality.In the last episode of the podcast, I started a series on living The Engaged Life.  We continue that series in this episode.

If you have focused on living those 3 P’s of Passion, Purpose, and Presence, you can amplify your Engaged Life with attending to 3 areas.  All 3 come from within you.  You can bring more engagement, more connection, more depth, and more meaning into your life.

Amplifying is all about adding Power to those 3 P’s.  And all about enlarging that Engaged Life for yourself.

Listen in to this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, so that you can amp your engagement.

RELATED RESOURCE
3 P’s of Engaged Life
Your Spiritual Life
Gratitude in Your Life
Book:  The Thrive Principles

3 P’s Of Living Engaged

The Engaged Life Series

The 3 P's of living an engaged and present life. Live with passion and purpose.Do you ever that you are “playing small”?  That there should be more to life?  More for YOU to do in life?  More your life should be about?

That life you are thinking about… that is the Engaged Life.  Living with more engagement, more depth, more meaning… more purpose.

Over the years, this has been a fairly constant refrain from clients:  “There should be more to life than THIS.”  There is….

Engaging in life.  Being engaged in life.

Living a bit deeper… a bit wider.

Over the years, 3 P’s have emerged as the Path to living an engaged life.  Those 3 P’s:  Passion, Purpose, and Presence.

When you are focused on building those 3 areas, your Engaged Life builds.

In this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, I cover the 3 P’s of Living an Engaged Life.  Listen below.

RELATED RESOURCES
Meaning and Purpose in Life
Showing UP in Life
We Have Fears
Book:  Thrive Principles

 

Fear Versus Courage

FearVersusCourageI don’t know about you, but I don’t much enjoy feeling fear.  I’d rather it not be a part of my life.

And yet, it is.

Fear is part of our wiring, deep in our DNA and deep in the circuitry of our brains. It keeps us safe — sometimes super-safe.  Which is the problem.

There is a central life coaching question:  “Where do you want to be?”  (Few people seek out coaching because everything is great, they are happy, and life is where they want it to be.)

The next question is “What keeps you from getting there?”  When I dig in with clients, that question often hits against external barriers.  Things the client can’t change.

But dig long enough and dig deep enough, and you hit fear.  Fear is what often keeps us from getting what we want in life, from getting the life we most deeply dream about.

If fear is a fact of life (it is), then fear isn’t really as much in our way as we let it be.  After all, other people (who also have fears) have made it.

What breaks through the fear, to get us to the life we want?

It is not being “fearless.”  That won’t happen… although you can have LESS fear.

Nope.

It is COURAGE.  And courage is not the opposite of fear… it is action in the direction of fear.  Which is what dissipates fear.

Let’s talk about fear… and more important, courage… in this episode of the Thriveology Podcast.

RELATED RESOURCES
We ALL Have Fears
Facing Fears
Your Fierce Life
Book:  Thrive Principles
Book:  The Immutable Laws Of Living