Positive Psychology

Give Thanks

November 21, 2022 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Thanksgiving, the holiday, is often lost in food and family. What is lost? Our opportunity to experience gratitude. The chance to really give thanks.

Many times, it can feel like an obligation. Instead, I suggest we see it as an opportunity. Even in tough moments (actually, especially in tough moments), we can make a shift from fear to thanks, from lack to sufficiency.

Over the years of my podcast, I have repeated this theme, both on Thanksgiving episodes and elsewhere. Below is a list of the various episodes around thanksgiving and gratitude. Just click each one to listen to the episodes.

>> Why Thankful?

>> Why Being Thankful Matters

>> Giving Thanks: Thriving Through Gratitude

>> What Thriving People Know About Gratitude And Appreciation

>> Living Your Engagement

And if you want to find my books on thriving, CLICK HERE.

Community and Connection

January 17, 2022 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

It’s in our DNA. We have a need to connect with others, to have connections and relationships. We express that in close relationships and larger groups.

And unfortunately, lately, we have often allowed tribalism into our connections. When we slip into our tribal thinking, we work from a place of exclusion. This leads to a greater illusion of connection. In reality, that connection is based in being the same as others in the tribe.

Community, on the other hand, allows others to include themselves. It is not about differences. Lines are not drawn to separate. Differences have room for inclusion. And true connection can grow.

Speaking of connection… we need connection in life to thrive. Those who are caught in isolation suffer, both emotionally and in their health. It is also deeply wired into our DNA.

Where is YOUR community?

Where is YOUR connection?

Listen to this episode of Thriveology Podcast for why community and connection are so important.

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Challenge: Thrive Code #1
Control: Thrive Code #2

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Finding Self-Confidence

October 4, 2021 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

HowToBuildSelfConfidence We all want confidence — SELF-confidence. We want to be confident before we act. In other words, I want to feel confident of myself before I move toward something.

Or maybe that’s just me! 🙂

But I think that comes at it from the wrong direction. FEAR seems to be between us and action. Mostly because of the order we have for action:

Confidence ==> Action ==> Success.

But instead, we have:

FEAR ==> Wait for Confidence ==> Keep Waiting

If you understandt the real flow, then you can step aside and let fear pass you by, letting you take action AND gain confidence.

Listen to this episode of the Thriveology Podcast to learn more.

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Getting Un-Stuck
Fear Is A Given
New Book: Immutable Laws Of Living

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What’s Your Challenge??

July 26, 2021 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Are you up for a challenge?

In the last episode of my podcast, I discussed how to hold on when life is tough. That’s when life is challenging you.

But what about when life isn’t so challenging… where life is copacetic? Just cruising.

It’s my observation that we work hard to keep life flat. We work hard to keep things smooth. Cold out? Turn on the heater. Hot out? Turn on the A/C. Keep things even… even-keeled. Flat.

We spend LOTS of energy to save the energy of dealing witb challenges, big or small.

But does that help (or harm) us? Does it keep us safe or make us fragile?

What if taking on small challenges actually gets us better prepared for bigger challenges? What if making choices to expand into life helps us deal with life encroaching upon us?

One of my “things” is to find little challenges for myself… new things to try, new activities to do, new tastes or sounds to take in, and new ways to try life.

How about you? What challenges are you taking on right now?

Listen to this episode of the Thriveology Podcast to discover the power of a challenge.

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How to Be FREE

March 1, 2021 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

One day, I was watching some videos (you know how that rabbit hole works) that led me to a video on this interesting sport. I love water sports, and am frequently daydreaming this time of year about being in warm water.

I have no idea how that led to this video, but it was a team playing this weird underwater game of hockey/ultimate frisbee/survival thing. It was the Underwater Torpedo League.

Underwater Torpedo was invented by two former special ops guys. They used it to help training clients get better at breath holding and calm under stress. But it sure looked like a blast of a time! I filed it under “I’d love to do that!”

Fast-forward and I met these two guys. Turns out they do more than just train some people. They actually train professional athletes on a regular basis, including MMA, NFL, and even pro surfers.

Prime Hall and Don Tran are the guys behind the game. But they are also performance coaches outside the pool. They work with people about performing in life, using their F.R.E.E. Your Mind protocol. Through their coaching, they help people reduce stress, perform better, and become better versions of themselves.

In this episode, Don and Prime discuss their protocol with me, so that you can make shifts toward higher performance in all of your pursuits.

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Find Hope or Build Hope

November 9, 2020 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Where does hope come from? Does it come upon us? Do we discover it? Or do we build it?

I believe that hope is an important ingredient in thriving. If you have no hope, it is tough to thrive. Finding hope often helps us find thriving.

Oh, and thriving is not about having an easy life, always exciting and happy. A thriving life is built on taking on the challenges of life. Not avoiding them, but taking them on, learning from them, and thriving because of them.

2020 has been the year of challenges. So, it has also given us lots of opportunities to work on thriving. How has it been for you? Hopeful or hopeless?

What if hope is built? What if all you have to do in order to find hope is follow a formula?

As is true for many things in life, the formula is pretty simple. But that is not to be confused with easy. Do remember that thriving is rarely built, though, on the easy. Taking on the simple, but important, is often the path to thriving.

In this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, we take a look at hope. Where it comes from, how you can find it, and how you can live it… both for yourself and the world.

Listen below.

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Is the Present Perfect?

September 21, 2020 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

My client was telling me about lots of struggles, difficult times, and a few positive moments. I noted, as I have many times with many clients, “It sounds like your present is perfect.”

She went silent. I was silent. But I could see her processing and struggling with my words. I sat quietly.

She finally erupted: “Perfect?!? How can you say that? After all the stuff I told you… how can you tell me that things are perfect?”

I told her, “I didn’t say great. I didn’t say it was how you wanted them to be. Only that the present is perfect.”

In that moment, I could see her gears turning… but she still couldn’t make sense of what I was saying.

How can things feel upside-down and inside-out, and be perfect?

“Perfect” does not mean preferred. It means something is complete. A perfectly cooked steak is complete. It is cooked to a certain level. But also consider a “perfect storm,” the perfect combination of circumstances that mean the storm is more powerful than when those circumstances don’t combine.

The idea of the Present Perfect, which sounds like grammar, comes from life coach, Thomas Leonard. He noted that the Present Perfect is the fact that this moment perfectly reflects everthing that has come before, up until now.

Why does that matter? We explore it in this episode of the Thriveology Podcast. Listen below

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3 Moves for a Better Day

July 13, 2020 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Sometimes, it seems that any change in life has to be a 180° turn… starting or stopping something you were not doing or doing. And sometimes, that is important. You might stop smoking, start exercising, or make some other major shift in life.

But in reality, more of growth in life is really about continued improvement. This matches the Japanese idea of kaizen, or “change for the better.” This is the concept behind many manufactoring processes — small incremental changes that amount to bigger cumulative improvement.

That can apply to your life! It probably already does, but can you make it more intentional? For example, let’s say I start exercising. I go for a 20 minute run/walk. That might be a 180° change — I started doing something I wasn’t doing. But then what? I would likely not just stay with that. I might add more time, more distance, or maybe run for a higher percentage. Gradual improvements that add up to more change.

Which leads to this episode of the Thriveology Podcast. I cover 3 moves you can make for a better day. Two of the moves involve one tool I have used with my coaching clients for years. It is a powerful process that has led to some pretty amazing transformations.

The other is just one to add in… or constantly improve… depending upon whether it is already a part of your life or not.

If you are ready to build a better day, these 3 moves can be the key. And guess what? It will only shift 30 minutes of your day. All for a huge shift in life!

You can listen below.

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Challenge Makes Us Grow

April 27, 2020 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

When I was a kid, I hit this point when I was growing fast. So fast that my limbs hurt, I constantly tripped, and knocked everthing over as my hand got there before I expected. Growth was a challenge.

Generally, though, it works the other way. When we are challenged (and take it on), we grow. A child wants to crawl, then walk, then run. But wanting to is not the same as being able to. Crawling ends up being a bellyflop. Walking leads to teetering bottom-bumps. And running… well, that just leads to face-plants. But so far, I have never seen a child give up and say, “Well, I just can’t do that. I guess I’m not meant to crawl/walk/run.” The child just tries again.

Challenge is something we can rise to, expand into. And when we do, challenge is the impetus for growth.

In this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, I talk with Steve Sims. At the age of 15, Steve finished his schooling in England, and stepped right into what seemed to be his destiny: masonry. Just like his father, his grandfather, his uncles, and his cousins. In an instant of inspiration, Steve looked at his family and realized this was not his destiny. As he told me, it was not that he was better than his family, but that he thought there was something better for him.

That set him on a search for his own destiny, a way to see the world and meet people with different viewpoints and lifestyles. This twisted path has led to now. Through taking on challenges and growing through them.

Listen in as Steve and I discuss his life, his challenges, and the success of taking on those challenges.

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The Fear/Anxiety Contagion

April 6, 2020 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

It’s highly contagious. You can catch it from a single interaction with one person. You can catch it much faster in a crowd. You can pass it on to someone else in an instant.

You can also catch it from just reading, watching, or listening to something.

In 39 milliseconds, you have it… and you didn’t even see it coming!

Coronavirus? Nope. That is certainly serious, and you absolutely want to do everything you can to avoid catching or spreading it. I do not want to minimize the risks of this pandemic.

But that is not the contagion I am focusing on here.

This contagion is fear and anxiety. Yes, you can catch fear. Yes, you can catch anxiety. And you can also spread them.

Humans have a natural wiring (we share it with the animals at the watering hole… and all the others) to pick up on fear and anxiety.

Many times, people have said, “Should I panic over this?” The “this” has been lots of different things. And my answer is always, “Panic is never a better option. Should you respond? Should you choose an action? Yes. Panic? No.”

That is easier said than done. But on this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, I share why fear/anxiety is contagious, along with how to limit the infection. Listen below.

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