Finding Moments of Calm in Times of Chaos

David Dachinger and Tamara Green, how to find calm in chaotic times, using the Loving Meditations App.What a chaotic time we are in!  Even without a pandemic, it was already chaotic, what with politics and changes in society. Stir in a pandemic, and there is NO way to be calm.

Right?

Or maybe….

Maybe calm is not about what is happening around you, outside of you. Perhaps it comes from somewhere within you. Somewhere that knows you are separate from the external chaos.

Our internal response to a chaotic world can be chaos… or we might be able to find calm. Especially if we can separate our thoughts from the events and emotions. If we can find a space between what is happening and how we respond.  A space that is rooted in peace.

On this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, I have a chance to speak with David Dachinger and Tamara Green.  David is a firefighter and a Grammy nominated music composer (quite the contrast there!).  And Tamara is an author and licensed therapist.

When David was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer (there IS no stage 5), his world shifted chaos from fighting fires to fighting cancer. He and Tamara realized that they needed to rally their resources to help in David’s health and healing. That included meditation and mindfulness. The resources they developed are now helping others to find calm in the midst of chaos.

Not a bad goal in today’s world, is it?

Listen below to hear their story and their method of bringing calm to the world through an app.

RELATED RESOURCES
LovingMeditations App
David and Tamara’s Website
Calming Your Thriving Body Episode
A Thriving Breath Episode
Coping with COVID Series
Thrive Principles Book

Thinking Through The Pandemic

Coping with COVID Series

 

Donald Robertson, modern Stoic philosopher and therapist.I was at a book signing a while back, signing a book of mine that is a few years old.  This person picked it up, looked at the publication date, put it down, and said, “I was looking for something more recent.”

That had me pondering… how long is information valid?  Sure, I would not likely want to read a computer book about the Windows 98 operating system, or about the coming “Y2K crisis.”  But what about transformational information?  When does that lose value?

Human brains have not changed in structure for millenia.  Which is why we still garner insight and understanding from books written millenia ago.  Ancient thoughts and texts still illuminate us these days.

Which brings me to my guest this week on the Thriveology Podcast.  I asked Donald Robertson to talk with me about some pretty old thoughts.  No, Donald is not millenia old.  But the philosophy he espouses and teaches is.  Donald is a modern Stoic philosopher, drawing on ancient Stoicism and what it offers to us in our current world.

And in our current pandemic situation, Stoic thought has LOTS to teach us.  In fact, Stoic thought is the underlying philosophy of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, the cornerstone of modern mental health counseling.

Donald discusses the relevance of Stoic philosophy in today’s world, and how we can apply it to the pandemic in which we find ourselves.  Listen in as Donald Robertson gives some powerful help in dealing with our thoughts and our emotions in the midst of today’s (and future) struggles.

RELATED RESOURCES
DonaldRobertson.name
ModernStoicism.com
What Thriving People Know About Thoughts
Your Thoughts, Your Stories
Live Each Day as THE Day

Breathe for Your Health and Calm

Coping with COVID Series

James Nestor, author of Deep and Breath.It happens about 25,000 per day.  And for the most part, it is automatic.  But it is one of the few bodily functions that you can “take off automatic” and choose how you will do it.  And you might not be doing it optimally.

What is it?

Breathing.  Taking a breath.  Inhaling and exhaling.

I know, it seems automatic, right?  But you can choose to take a deep breath.  Or you can hold your breath.  You may breathe out of your nose.  Or you may breathe with your mouth (you may want to change that one… listen to the podcast for why).

Breathing one way can stress you out.  Breathing another way will calm you down (meaning, you can choose which way you want to breathe!).

Since you are currently reading this, we can assume you are breathing.  That’s a great start?  How about breathing BETTER?  That is a process that can take you down lots of paths.

On this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, I interview James Nestor.  A journalist and writer, James got interested in breathing from an ealier book, Deep, which focused on freediving (people going very deep for a long time, because they are excellent breathers).

His upcoming (and excellent) book is Breath.  It is a super-deep (and very readable) “dive” into breathing — why it is important, how to do it better, and what difference it makes.

When I heard about the book, I knew I needed to get James on the podcast, at this moment.  His book won’t be out until May (but go ahead and pre-order it!).  But with the pandemic, you need this information now.  So, I got him on!  And James offered some simple, easy ways to uber-breathe to help your health.

This is super important.  Take a listen below!  (Then order his book!)

RELATED RESOURCES
Breath – from Amazon
Breath – from Bookstore.org (they support local bookstores)
James Nestor’s website

Coping with COVID Series

The COVID Coping SeriesWhat a time we are living through in the world!  The COVID-19 pandemic has brought many parts of culture and the economy to a screeching halt.  Other parts are overwhelmed with the pace.

Frontline and essential workers are feeling the overwhelm of responsibility.  Most of the rest are feeling the overwhelm of isolation.

We WILL get through this.  That is what we, as humans, do.  We overcome.  We rise to the challenge.  We push through.  And we will do the same with this crisis.

But between here and there, we have to live.  We can move beyond just surviving.  We just start with surviving.  And we reach from there.

Over the past month, I have been releasing podcast episodes that focus on dealing with the COVID crisis, both in terms of thriving and in terms of relationships.

I have grouped them together here, so you can find them easily.  Some are from my Thriveology Podcast, and others from my Save The Marriage Podcast.

Here they are:

THRIVING-ORIENTED EPISODES:

Thriving in an Age of Panic

Stay Sane While Staying Safe

How to Hope in Tough Times

The Fear/Anxiety Contagion

RELATIONSHIP-ORIENTED EPISODES:

What Now? – Saving your marriage in the midst of a pandemic

Staying the Course in a Crisis (or 2)

Coping as a Couple Caught in COVID Quarantine

Time for a Relationship Reset?

The Fear/Anxiety Contagion

Coping with COVID Series

How to avoid being infected by the emotional contagion of fear and anxiety, especially during the coronavirus pandemic.  Special coronavirus podcast episode.It’s highly contagious.  You can catch it from a single interaction with one person.  You can catch it much faster in a crowd.  You can pass it on to someone else in an instant.

You can also catch it from just reading, watching, or listening to something.

In 39 milliseconds, you have it… and you didn’t even see it coming!

Coronavirus?  Nope.  That is certainly serious, and you absolutely want to do everything you can to avoid catching or spreading it.  I do not want to minimize the risks of this pandemic.

But that is not the contagion I am focusing on here.

This contagion is fear and anxiety.  Yes, you can catch fear.  Yes, you can catch anxiety.  And you can also spread them.

Humans have a natural wiring (we share it with the animals at the watering hole… and all the others) to pick up on fear and anxiety.

Many times, people have said, “Should I panic over this?”  The “this” has been lots of different things.  And my answer is always, “Panic is never a better option.  Should you respond?  Should you choose an action? Yes.  Panic?  No.”

That is easier said than done. But on this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, I share why fear/anxiety is contagious, along with how to limit the infection.  Listen below.

RELATED RESOURCES
Dealing with Fear
Attacking Anxiety
Self-Care
Order, Disorder, Reorder

Lee’s Thrive Books

How to Hope in Tough Times

Coping with COVID Series

How to have hope in tough times — coronavirus and other times.Let me just say, I am a bit weary.  How about you?

This has been a wearying time for so many of us.  Nobody is unaffected by this pandemic.  And we can’t even point to an end to the crisis.  Take a guess, and your guess is probably as good as any other.

What do we do?  Everything seems to be upside-down, inside-out, and topsy-turvy.  It’s hard to figure out what happens next and what to do next.

Which means that some people are beginning to feel hopeless.

Early in my career, as a hospital chaplain, I saw what happens when people have hope… and when they lose hope.  But I didn’t really have any way to help people who were hitting hopelessness.  I just saw the damage.

Thanks to other researchers, I am more clear about how we can build and hold hope, even in tough times.  If you can’t hold it in tough times, it just needs some boosting, and some knowledge.

Let’s talk about hope, tough times, and the Hope Formula.  Listen below.

RELATED RESOURCES
Dealing with Stress
Dealing with Loss and Grief
Dealing with Depression
Dealing with Fear and Anxiety
Lee Baucom’s Books

 

Stay Sane While Staying Safe

Coping with COVID Series

How to stay sane while staying safe in Did you hear about the guy who had been on a meditation retreat for a couple of weeks?  He went in with “life as usual.”  And he emerged into a whole new world.  One where people are practicing social distance, sheltering at home, and scared.  One where restaurants, coffee shops, and bars are closed or limited.  One where every cough is scary.

And one where we are trying to figure out the “new normal.”

How are you doing with it?  Feeling the stress or finding your calm?  Struggling with your day, or finding a new routine for your day?

One issue with this crisis is we don’t have an end date.  Nor do we know how bad (or not so bad) things might be — which is influenced by what we do as citizens and fellow humans!

How do we stay sane while we are trying to stay safe?  That is my subject for this episode of the Thriveology Podcast.

Let’s talk about some strategies for doing your best to live your best in the midst of this crisis.  Basically, how to stay sane while being safe.

Listen below.

RELATED RESOURCES:
Need some reading?  Check out my books.
CDC Info Page on the Coronavirus Crisis
WHO Info Page on the Coronavirus Crisis
Thriving In An Age of Panic Episode

Thriving in an Age of Panic

Coping with COVID Series

How to thrive in an age of panic — dealing with the corona virus pandemic without panic.When I recorded this episode of the Thriveology Podcast, it was almost another world.  Many people were still minimizing the novel coronavirus.  Even politicians were downplaying the severity and impact.

So much has changed.  Many, if not most, schools are closed to face-to-face instruction.  Many workers are working from home, where possible.  Lots of restaurants are only serving by delivery or take-out.  New guidelines suggest not being around more than 10 people… and that number may go down.

The world has changed, almost overnight.

It affects us all… making this episode just as important, if not more so.

We are going to have to define what it means to thrive.  That is what happens when it feels like every day is an attempt to survive.

Here is the good news:  humanity will prevail. We can thrive. Life WILL go on.  But it will never be the same.  Things will change.  How we used to do things will disappear, but new ways will appear.

I know these are scary times.  But we will get through this.  Together.

That’s what we do.

Lisen to the episode below.

RELATED RESOURCES:
CDC Information
WHO Information
Johns Hopkins Guide to Coronavirus
Check Out My Books to Help Thrive

Happiness Is A Constant Reset

Michaela Renee Johnson on making constant resets to find happiness.Happiness is a funny thing, isn’t it?  One day, it’s right there… right in front of you.  Then, just as quickly… it’s gone.  Why is it so hard to hold onto happiness?

Maybe more importantly, is there a way to shift into happiness, nearly at will?

I am always concerned about how lightly we take happiness.  Our culture makes it THE goal, and not a part of your goal.  But worse, happiness often ends up being about waiting for something to happen.  Notice:  HAPPy and HAPPen.  Same root.  It is about something out there happening to make you happy.

My guest this week, Michaela Renee Johnson, believes that happiness is really about making constant resets.  It is about looking for and finding the points of happiness… not waiting for them to just happen.

After an unorthodox childhood (based on family necessity), Michaela became something of a free-spirit wanderer.  She finally found her way to her calling as a psychotherapist… and spends her time helping others “speak their truth with grace and live a courageous life of authenticity.”  Something she did, herself.

Listen below on how to find happiness through constant reset.

RELATED RESOURCES
Michaela’s Website
The Happiness Trap
It’s Not (Entirely) About Happiness
Chasing Mis-Wants
Thrive Principles Book

Getting Clear By Getting Real

Lisa Cherney shares her 12 Commandments for Getting F***ing Real.What happens when you feel hollow and lost in life, even when you are surrounded by people?

What happens when you find success… only to discover it wasn’t really the success you wanted?

What happens when you realize that you’ve been hiding and pretending… not being yourself… even when you are with friends and loved ones?

You may just keep on pushing forward.

Or you might get real.  My guest on this episode pushes the Get Real part, adding that you need to “get f***ing real.”  (Don’t worry.  We never actually say it on the episode… it isn’t really a part of my vocabulary.  But Lisa does make the point that this is REALLY important, getting real.

Lisa Cherney built a successful business helping others build their successful mission-focused businesses.  And even with a 7-figure business… it was not the success she wanted.  She was helping others follow their passion… and was losing her own.

One day, while traveling, she started jotting down some statements… some commandments… that she believed she needed to follow.  About getting real.  Being clear.  Of being aligned.

Those statements became her “12 Commandments of Getting F***ing Real.”  And with that, she closed down her 7-figure business and followed her own mission.  To be clear, to be real… and to help others do the same.

Listen in as Lisa and I discuss what it means to Get Real.  Why it matters.  And why the world needs Real people now, more than ever.

RELATED RESOURCES
Lise Cherney’s Website w/ 12 Commandments of Getting… Real
How to Guarantee You DON’T Thrive, Part 1
How to Guarantee You DON’T Thrive, Part 2
Learn or… Learn
Course Corrections and Course Changes