“I’m Just Not Happy” and What To Do About It

What to do when you are "just not happy."Do you ever hear yourself say (or just feel), “I’m just not happy”?

What does it mean? What’s keeping you feeling better?  It might be depression. But it might be something else. (If you are concerned about depression, CHECK OUT THESE RESOURCES.)

There are some other reasons for “just not being happy.”  In fact, in this week’s podcast (you can listen below), I note 4 different reasons.  The good news is there is a path through each one.  But you can only follow the path when you identify it.

If you are “just not happy,” take a listen.  If you know someone who is “just not happy,” invite them to listen with you!

Surviving Headline Overload

Surviving Headline OverloadI noticed it sometime around September of last year. . . I was getting sucked into the news!  And for several years, I had done a pretty good job of limiting my exposure to the “news.”

It seems more like an addiction. . . one little taste. . . and you are pulled right back in!

To be clear, I am not against the news.  I am not against reporters.  I am not against the networks.  EACH of us is responsible for how we take in the information.  It’s just that too much news does little to inform, but lots to disturb.

Which often leaves us feeling scared, stressed, and helpless.  None are necessarily true.  Just the way it makes us feel.

In this week’s podcast, I discuss how to deal with (and survive) Headline Overload.

HELPFUL RESOURCES:
Dealing With Anxiety
You and Your Thoughts
The Thrive Principles

Using Mindfulness To Thrive

Tools To Thrive Series

Thrive tool of mindfulness.It’s a hot topic these days:  Mindfulness.

It has been touted as a stress reliever.  But it is far more than that (although it does relieve stress).  Mindfulness is really an awareness your experience.  In other words, instead of lost in thought or distracted, you are experiencing the world and you in it.

When you are mindful, you are more engaged with others.  You taste the food you are eating.  You feel the environment around you.

And you are not as lost in thought.  Do remember that your emotional state is a derivative of your thoughts (NOT your experience of your environment).

Stress is really about fear.  Fear comes from thoughts.  Not the experience, but your thoughts and interpretations of the experience.  Reconnecting with the experience disengages the thoughts.

Give it a try.  I give 3 simple mindfulness exercises in the podcast below.

Tools of Thriving Series
Introduction
Thought Awareness
Only Control What You Can

The Responsibility Formula
The Perspective Shift
Your Built-In Importance Indicator
The Importance Matrix
The Appreciation Approach
A Thriving Breath
Systemize Your Life

A Thriving Breath

Tools To Thrive Series

Using your breathing as a way to thrive and be healthy.It happens automatically.  You don’t even think about it.  Unless you choose to notice it — or even change it.  And it’s a good thing it happens automatically.  Otherwise, you would not last long.

Breathing.

Even if you don’t ever think about it, your breathing will keep oxygen coming into your body and carbon dioxide going out of your body. In and out.  All day long.

No big deal, right?

Wrong.

HOW you breathe determines whether your body acts as if there is a threat or whether your body assumes everything is alright.  One way causes stress.  The other way creates calm.

One way is how you likely breathe on a regular basis — and especially when there is a perceived threat or stressful situation.  The other way allows you to calm yourself down, increase your oxygen supply, and shift away from fear/stress.

Ready to shift to a thriving breath?  Listen below

Tools of Thriving Series
Introduction
Thought Awareness
Only Control What You Can

The Responsibility Formula
The Perspective Shift
Your Built-In Importance Indicator
The Importance Matrix
The Appreciation Approach

The Perspective Shift

Tools To Thrive Series

Shift Your PerspectiveAs I ran through the woods, I could only see the trees and path right in front of me.  I had no idea how far up the mountain I had climbed.  I had no idea about the turns in the trail ahead.  And I couldn’t even see very far back, given all the twists.  My vision was only the few yards ahead.

Sometimes, life is like that.  We are so close to something, we lose perspective.  We can only see the next little period of time.  Which means that some things seem bigger than they are, and some things seem insignificant, but prove important.

Fortunately, one tool in your Thrive Toolbox is the capacity of changing perspectives when you want.

This week, to equip you, I want to provide you with 4 perspective shifts you can use.  Then, you can see the forest, even when the trees are right in front.

Tools of Thriving Series
Introduction
Thought Awareness
Only Control What You Can

The Responsibility Formula

The Responsibility Formula

Tools To Thrive Series

Being 100% Responsible:  The Responsibility Formula

E + R = O

It’s one of my favorite formulas.  And it isn’t even math!

Well, it kinda is.  It is the Responsibility Formula Dr. Robert Resnick developed, and Jack Canfield popularized.

And it is powerful.

Like most formulas, all the parts must be present.

Many times, people assume that what happens around them determines what happens to them.  They miss a piece of the formula.

Sometimes, people assume they have full control of life, that they can choose their path, without outside interference.  They also miss a piece of the formula.

Master this formula and you will have a grasp on responsibility in your life — and how to work the formula in your favor.

Tools of Thriving Series
Introduction
Thought Awareness
Only Control What You Can

What’s Your Center Point?

What's your focus point, your center point, in a dizzying world?It’s a dizzying world, disorienting and jarring.  And every day, you have to make decisions about how to live your life.  What is your primary focus point?  How do you orient your life?

In workshops, I have asked this same question.  People begin to name their priorities:  family, happiness, reputation, respect, or even profit.  Does that provide a moment-by-moment re-orientation?

Nope.

The other day, I was on a crazy, spinny ride with my daughter.  I told her, “Keep your eyes focused on the middle, right in the center.”  In the middle of the ride, I did just the opposite, looking to my side.

I was immediately dizzy.  But as soon as I turned my focus back to the center, the middle point, my focus came back.  The dizziness fell away.

In this dizzying world, what is your center point?  I’ll tell you mine. . .

6 Steps To Dealing With Stress

How to Beat Stress

6 strategies for beating stress.How many times do you hear someone say, “I’m so stressed!”  Or how many times do YOU think and feel that?

We live in a culture that seems to revel in being stressed.  Unfortunately, it is sometimes a badge of honor — the cost of being in demand and doing important stuff.

But is it?

How do you not just “deal” with stress, but beat stress?  Well, first, we need to be clear about what stress REALLY is (and what it isn’t).  Then, we can talk about strategies for addressing the REAL issue.

When you are “stressed,” there isn’t a solution.   When you know what it is, the solution(s) are easier.

Let’s talk about defeating stress with 6 strategies in the training below.

How To Deal With Difficult People

How to deal with difficult people.“You can’t take my joy!”  What a great line.  And it fits so many times.  You are having a great day — and then that one person, that difficult person. . . .  They try to rob your joy!

So, how DO you deal with difficult people?  Because they are all around.  At work, in your community. . . maybe even in your own family!

You can’t escape them.  You need a plan on how to deal with them.

Let me tell you my 6 steps for dealing with difficult people.

And if you need to upgrade your boundaries, CLICK HERE for free training.  If you need to upgrade your personal standards, CLICK HERE for free training.

(Listen to How To Deal With Difficult People training below.)