Finding Compassion

Over the past 7 episodes, we have been building our Thrive Code.  The code to follow that allows us to thrive, and also the code that runs your system, like computer code.  And we are closing in on the finish line!

How to find compassion.  Build your compassion for others and yourself as a path to thriving.We bring the series to an end in this episode. The final piece of the Thrive Code is all about how we feel about others.  Do we see others as “other” or as connected to us?  Do we use compassion or do we objectify?

I have a built in belief that we are born with compassion.  Babies and children have a natural compassionate response to others in pain.  But many times, people are taught to not have a compassionate response.  We are taught beliefs about why others are having problems.  Often, those beliefs are based in blame and condemnation.

It is no surprise, then, that we are living in a compassion crisis.  Both in terms of compassion for others and self-compassion.

Is there a way back?  Yes!  And it starts with understanding exactly what compassion is, where it comes from, why we lose it, and how we can cultivate it.  Learn more in this episode of the Thriveology Podcast.

Listen below.

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Why Self-Compassion Is More Important Than Self-Confidence

Self-compassion is more important than self-confidence or self-esteem in having a thriving life.So much press on self-esteem.  And so little evidence that self-esteem predicts success or mental health.  A higher-than-average level of self-esteem is, however, associated with juvenile delinquency and narcissism.

Then why do we find schools, parents, and other organizations focused on building self-esteem in ourselves and our children?

There is something else that has been demonstrated to help with mental health and well-being.  That “something else” is self-compassion.

When things are tough, do you give yourself a break?  Not “let yourself off the hook,” but remind yourself that you are doing the best you can?

My guess is you have the same thing in your mind that I do:  a critical voice that is happy to point out my shortcomings and foibles.  You might even listen to the same critical voice that you would tell a friend to ignore.

Self-compassion is about understanding that you (and others) do the best you (and they) can do, given current state-of-mind and situations.  Instead of listening to the critical voice, how about the loving voice that knows you are, like it or not, human.  And that you are trying.

This is not about saying “I have no need to change, here I am.”  But it is about saying, “here I am, and I need to accept that.  I need to give myself a break!”

Learn about self-compassion — what it is and how to extend it to yourself.