I don’t know about you, but I was raised around competition. Not so much from my parents, but from culture. In school, you compete in all sorts of tasks… trying to prove how smart, how good, how talented, how athletic, how whatever you are… compared to the others.
It doesn’t stop there, but keeps on going. Win or lose. That’s all that matters. Well, winning. That’s what matters.
Remember Ricky Bobby from the movie, Talladega Nights? “If you ain’t first, you’re last!” In other words, you win… or you have lost.
(Do remember, though, that at another point in the movie, Ricky Bobby is talking with his Dad… and gets challenged:
Ricky Bobby: “Wait, Dad. Don’t you remember the time you told me ‘If you ain’t first, you’re last’?”
Reese Bobby: “Huh? What are you talking about, Son?”
Ricky Bobby: “That day at school.”
Reese Bobby: “Oh hell, Son, I was high that day. That doesn’t make any sense at all, you can be second, third, fourth… hell you can even be fifth.”
Ricky Bobby: “What? I’ve lived my whole life by that!”
There you go… a first… a quote in a Will Ferrell movie to make a point about thriving!)
We grow up on that whole “win or learn” thing… which ties us tightly to our ego. If we win, ego boost. If we lose, ego bruise. What will others think??
Maybe it is worth making a shift.
Nelson Mandela said, “I never lose. I either win or I learn.” When you don’t win, you can learn! Great shift. “Losing” is an opportunity for learning. When you don’t win, there is an opportunity for growth, for learning… for being better.
But it is still bound by ego. What if it isn’t even the win? But the learn? Then, we either learn… or we learn.
Listen to this episode for more on winning/losing versus learning/learning.
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Let me be clear: I can claim NO expertise in jiu jitsu. I have only been involved since January. So, what can I possibily tell you about jiu jitsu after just 6 months of practice?