how to deal with fear

From Fear to Courage

September 14, 2020 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

FearVersusCourage I don’t know about you, but I don’t much enjoy feeling fear. I’d rather it not be a part of my life.

And yet, it is.

Fear is part of our wiring, deep in our DNA and deep in the circuitry of our brains. It keeps us safe — sometimes super-safe. Which is the problem.

There is a central life coaching question: “Where do you want to be?” (Few people seek out coaching because everything is great, they are happy, and life is where they want it to be.)

The next question is “What keeps you from getting there?” When I dig in with clients, that question often hits against external barriers. Things the client can’t change.

But dig long enough and dig deep enough, and you hit fear. Fear is what often keeps us from getting what we want in life, from getting the life we most deeply dream about.

If fear is a fact of life (it is), then fear isn’t really as much in our way as we let it be. After all, other people (who also have fears) have made it.

What breaks through the fear, to get us to the life we want?

It is not being “fearless.” That won’t happen… although you can have LESS fear.

Nope.

It is COURAGE. And courage is not the opposite of fear… it is action in the direction of fear. Which is what dissipates fear.

Let’s talk about fear… and more important, courage… in this episode of the Thriveology Podcast.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

Fear Versus Courage

February 4, 2019 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

FearVersusCourage I don’t know about you, but I don’t much enjoy feeling fear. I’d rather it not be a part of my life.

And yet, it is.

Fear is part of our wiring, deep in our DNA and deep in the circuitry of our brains. It keeps us safe — sometimes super-safe. Which is the problem.

There is a central life coaching question: “Where do you want to be?” (Few people seek out coaching because everything is great, they are happy, and life is where they want it to be.)

The next question is “What keeps you from getting there?” When I dig in with clients, that question often hits against external barriers. Things the client can’t change.

But dig long enough and dig deep enough, and you hit fear. Fear is what often keeps us from getting what we want in life, from getting the life we most deeply dream about.

If fear is a fact of life (it is), then fear isn’t really as much in our way as we let it be. After all, other people (who also have fears) have made it.

What breaks through the fear, to get us to the life we want?

It is not being “fearless.” That won’t happen… although you can have LESS fear.

Nope.

It is COURAGE. And courage is not the opposite of fear… it is action in the direction of fear. Which is what dissipates fear.

Let’s talk about fear… and more important, courage… in this episode of the Thriveology Podcast.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

Fear Life or Fierce Life?

January 18, 2016 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

I used to wish for a fearless life. You know, that place where you no longer have fears. Only confidence and drive.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t want to live a life of fear, held back by fears and concerns.

I just no longer believe that a “fearless” life is possible. Fear is too important and too deeply embedded in us.

In fact, I want to have some fear around. Something needs to make me pause and say, “Is this safe? Should I be doing this?”

And more importantly, for a full life, I need fear to point out the important areas and important directions. As I have stated in other trainings and podcasts, fear is NOT an “Avoidance Indicator.” It is an “Importance Indicator.” Fear serves to point out when something is important. It may be of safety importance, or it could be of epic importance.

If the goal is not “fearless living,” then what is the goal?

Fierce Living.

Living fiercely. Focused, clear, intentional, and courageous.

How do you make the shift? Listen in to this week’s training.

And then, live fiercely!

PREVIOUS PODCASTS IN THE FEAR SERIES
The Other Side Of Fear
3 Myths of Fear
4 Steps to Taming Your Fear
Worry Less, Live More
2 Magic Questions To Live Beyond Fear

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

4 Steps to Taming Your Fear

December 28, 2015 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Tame your fear. You can never eliminate fear. But you CAN tame it!
Really, your choice is between feeding and growing your fear, or taming it. The first will only chase you further into a cave. The second option, taming it, leads you to what is most important to you.

When your fear is fed and grows, you grow smaller.

When your fear is tamed, you grow larger — into a larger life, with greater impact, deeper meaning, and more purpose.

There are 4 steps to taming your fear, once you name it. Here they are:

Call it out.
Assess it.
Aim.
Actualize.

Learn how to move through these steps and discover your larger life!

RELATED RESOURCES:
New Series: Fear
3 Myths of Fear
Martha Beck’s Article On Fear

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS

Your Basic Fears And How To Beat Them: Thriveology Podcast Ep. 7

December 16, 2013 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

We all have some basic fear responses to certain stimuli — in other words, everyone has things that scare them.

But there are some deeper, more existential fears, that seem to trip ALL of us up. They are based in some deep beliefs that we carry around from very young ages. At the same time, these fears have followed civilization through the ages.

These three basic fears can keep us stuck or keep us struggling, even when the fears are unfounded and useless.

Ready to discover these fears — and how to move beyond them? Join us for the Thriveology Podcast as we explore these three basic fears and how to deal with them.

Let me know what you think! Leave a comment or ask a question.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: RSS