dealing with tough times

Finding Calm in the Midst of Chaos

October 5, 2020 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

These are some crazy times, aren’t they? The world seems upside-down. A pandemic, politics, conspiracy theories… news just seems to be crazier and crazier every day.

And that can catch up with each of us, stressing us out and leaving us afraid. Which places your body and brain on constant alert.

That is exhausting.

And chaotic.

Why do those news stories and social media feeds keep us so amped up and stressed out? And how can you stay calm(er) in the midst of chaos?

In this episode of the Thriveology Podcast,

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Holding On (When Life Gets You Down)

September 30, 2019 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

Life is tough.

Not always. But along the way. And even after you get past one struggle, that doesn’t mean there isn’t another one up ahead. That’s just the nature of life.

It doesn’t mean you are doing anything wrong or that the world, God, or the Universe is out to teach you a lesson. It’s just the nature of life.

You may notice 2 crowds. First is the “Grind Culture” that just says to suck it up, keep on grinding, and MAKE it work. They have a point that you have to get through some tough times. But sometimes, it is wise to step back and ask if the fight is worth it.

Then there is the “Sign Culture.” That group tells you that any struggle is an indication you are on the wrong path, that something is wrong with you, and that life “should” be easy… if you are doing it right. They have a point that sometimes, a struggle is pointing to you moving the wrong way… swimming upstream. But the fact is, life means struggles… at times.

So what do you do to hold up when life gets you down?

We discuss it… and 5 things to do… on this episode of the Thriveology Podcast. Listen below.

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3 Growth Mindsets for Tough Times

November 6, 2017 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. 1 Comment

Your mindset doesn’t change what is happening “out there,” but it can change how you perceive it “in here,” in your mind and thoughts. Which can also change your actions.

The circumstances are the same. But whether you feel stuck or empowered, that depends upon the mindset you carry.

Over the years, I have worked to shift into more productive and useful mindsets when tough times hit.

(And I promise, they will hit — just part of life. Not a sign that the world, the universe, God, or anything else hates you, is teaching you a lesson, or anything else. Being alive means there will be tough times.)

In this week’s podcast, I try to compare some not-so-helpful mindsets with some better ones. I want to suggest three mindsets for you. And you can adopt them at any time!

Mindset is up to you. . . once you realize it is up to you!

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Building Your Resilience Muscle

October 30, 2017 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. Leave a Comment

You’ve got this muscle in you that you might not know about it. Maybe it is strong, just naturally. Or maybe you have built it on purpose. Or maybe it needs a little strengthening.

The muscle?

Your “resilience muscle.” It helps power you through tough times, so you can bounce back from the struggles.

Here’s the problem: many people don’t know you can build it. Many people do their best to avoid tough times and struggles. And many refuse to let that struggle build the muscle.

One problem: the struggles are unavoidable. But if you let that Resilience Muscle atrophy, those struggles are just tougher. If you strengthen the muscle, future struggles are not so insurmountable.

Let’s get fit and build that Resilience Muscle!

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Stop Avoiding Discomfort, Struggle, and Stress

February 8, 2016 by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D. 1 Comment

Where did we get the notion that life should be one smooth glide down Easy Street? Never has been, never will be. Life is full of struggles, times of discomfort, and challenges.

Thank goodness!

Growth only comes from the struggles and challenges. What we call “stress” is what gives us strength. We rise to a challenge, learn new skills, and get ready for the next challenge.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not encouraging you to chase after struggles and challenges. You don’t need to, since they will come your way.

The question is what you do when a struggle DOES come your way. Do you duck-and-hide, proclaim “life is unfair,” or do you take it on as a challenge? A challenge is something to move through, overcome, learn from, and grow into.

And THAT is the power of a struggle or challenge.

Life is an episode of: Discomfort ==> Change ==> Comfort ==> Discomfort (and repeat). We have periods of comfort, AFTER we have moved through the discomfort, the struggle — UNLESS we avoid the discomfort (or try to). Then, there is no growth, there is no new capacity, and really no comfort.

When the discomfort comes, will you take it on as a sign that it is time to grow?

Learn how in this week’s podcast episode.

(And, hey, if you like it, can you share it below?)

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