How To Deal With Difficult People

How to deal with difficult people.“You can’t take my joy!”  What a great line.  And it fits so many times.  You are having a great day — and then that one person, that difficult person. . . .  They try to rob your joy!

So, how DO you deal with difficult people?  Because they are all around.  At work, in your community. . . maybe even in your own family!

You can’t escape them.  You need a plan on how to deal with them.

Let me tell you my 6 steps for dealing with difficult people.

And if you need to upgrade your boundaries, CLICK HERE for free training.  If you need to upgrade your personal standards, CLICK HERE for free training.

(Listen to How To Deal With Difficult People training below.)

The KNAC Protocol To Help You Get Unstuck

From the Getting Unstuck Series

Follow the KNAC Protocol to get to true change.You here it all the time: “Knowledge is power.”

Not true.  Knowledge is just information.  Perhaps it is information that is digested and understood.  But it is still information.

For knowledge to be power, something else needs to be applied:  Action.  Action, based on knowledge, then becomes power.

But here’s the hook:  Action that is important is always accompanied by fear.  If there is no fear, it is routine, normal, and just an action.  If you are stuck, you are probably stuck because you know you need to go to the next step, and the next step is scary.

So, you need Courage.  Courage is from the heart, facing fear, and taking action.  It is not action with no fear.  Any action taken, in spite of fear, shows courage.

Together, the KNAC Protocol helps you to guide yourself through change, and helps you to get unstuck.

Listen below to master the KNAC Protocol.

(And here are links to the earlier segments of this series:)
Intro To Getting Unstuck
How You Get Stuck
You Are Not As Stuck As You Think
Give Up Your Goals & Get Unstuck

Loops
Shift Your Perspective
When Fear Has You Stuck
Anchored Or Stuck?

Shift Your Perspective

Getting Unstuck Series

Stuck?  Shift your perspective.When we get stuck, we can’t see beyond ourselves.  When we can’t see beyond ourselves, we get stuck.

Perspective — or lack of a different perspective — is what keeps us in that stuck space.

The good news is a shift in perspective is always available to you.  In fact, there are several shifts you can make, at will, at any time.

Use these shifts to get unstuck.  A new perspective gives you a new view.  See the forest, not just the tree in front of you.  Just beyond that is your UnStuck.

Listen below for how to shift your perspective and get unstuck.

Solving The Control Paradox

How to solve the Control Paradox.Control.  We all want it.  We strive for it, wrestle for it, grab for it. . . and end up trying to control the wrong things.

Human nature.  We try to control the things we can’t control, and abdicate control over the things we should control.

When we try to control people, events, and things external to us, we are headed for frustration and failure.

When we seek to control things within ourselves, we discover resolve and build a thriving life.

And yet, we generally seek to control those external things.  That happens out of fear.

At the same time, we fail to control those internal things within us.  That happens out of blame (and fear).

Time to solve the Control Paradox!  (Listen below for how to solve it.  And hey, if you find it useful, could you SHARE so that others can find it?)

 

Beliefs, Behavior, and a Fierce Life

Step into your Fierce Life!In the last podcast, I suggested giving up a Fear Life, and moving to a Fierce Life.  That was not a life devoid of fear, but one that chose a path in spite of fear.  It is the courageous life, lived with clarity and purpose, and with intensity.

Sometimes, how we think about ourselves, our personal beliefs, hold us back.  We get caught up in “I’m not. . .” and “I can’t. . . .”

When I started running, I never knew when I could start calling myself a “runner.”  When I decided to run?  After my first run?  After my first race?  After running for a week, a month, a year?

Sometimes, it is the difference between process and product.  For example, the “product” that many people want are 6-pack abs.  They forget about the process of daily healthy choices.  They get stuck on the end result, not the path to get there.

This is true with living a fierce life.  That life is built one choice, one step, one day, at a time.

To be honest, when I was preparing for the last few podcasts, I found myself saying, “I don’t live a fierce life — I’m not fierce.”  I let my old belief system establish whether I am that person or not.  Do I always live fiercely?  No.  But can I choose to live MORE fiercely?  Absolutely!

And a fierce life is built one choice, one decision, one action at a time.  Slowly, you become FIERCE.

2 Magic Questions To Live Beyond Fear

2 Magic Questions to help you live beyond fear.Over the years, I have met several people who told me they “had no fear.”  I immediately knew one of two things were true:  either they were unaware or or unwilling to admit to fear, or they were not pushing very hard.

That doesn’t mean that we should live in fear every day.  Only that fear is a part of any growth and development.

There are plenty of moments in life that are carefree and fearless.  But an overall life that is without fear is a life lived too small.

The danger, though, is being trapped by fear, reduced by fear, and boxed by fear.

People grow and change, though, through questions.  Asking, “I wonder. . . ” or “What if. . . ” or “How could I. . . ” lead to change, inventions, adventure, exploration.

Fear, on the other hand, lives in statements:  “You can’t do that. . . ” or “Be careful of that. . . ” or “I wouldn’t do that. . . .”

That’s the way fear keeps us hostage — by talking in absolutes.  Fear pretends to be the authority on what you can do, what you should do.

But fear doesn’t need to have the last word.  We can always sneak around fear, to find your bigger life, your better place.

Just ask the 2 Magic Questions I outline in the training, and you can move beyond your fear.

Grab a couple of sheets of paper and a pen, so you will be ready to follow the process.

PREVIOUS PODCASTS IN THE FEAR SERIES
The Other Side Of Fear
3 Myths of Fear
4 Steps to Taming Your Fear
Worry Less, Live More

What’s Your Experiment?

What's YOUR experiment?Children naturally do it.  Young adults do it.  And then we forget to keep it up.

Experimenting.  Life is built on it.  Any new development starts with it.

Right now, while I am writing this, I am in the middle of one of my experiments.  My torso is wrapped in frozen gel packs.  Yep, I am freezing myself (well, really just cooling my core).  This experiment is all about cold adaptation and what happens to my body.

But to be honest, that is one of my “kicks” in life, trying out little experiments here and there.  I have tried various eating programs, exercise regimens, learning experiments, and other pursuits.  Really, just to see what happens.

When you were a baby, at some point, you thought, “I wonder what would happen if I pulled myself up onto these feet.”  (OK, admittedly, you likely did not have those words.  But you did have that drive.)  Sometime later, you asked, “I wonder what would happen if I DIDN’T do what my parents told me.”  (And that may have ended in any number of ways — point being, you were experimenting.)

Later, you wondered what would happen if you chatted with that attractive person over there, took that job, took that training, moved to that city, etc., etc., etc.

In other words, experimenting is a part of life.

And then we forget to keep it up.  We get stuck in a rut, with the “same ‘ol, same ‘ol” being the daily life.

Time to experiment.  People tell me they don’t like change.  So, don’t worry about change.  Just try an experiment!

What’s YOUR experiment?

Extend Your 3 Horizons to Thrive

Extend your 3 horizons to really thrive.Sometimes, the horizon can seem to stretch in front of us forever.  Sometimes, it seems that we are smack up against the world.  We can’t see beyond where we are.  We can’t see past our problems and struggles.

Time to extend and expand your horizons.

There are three horizons we can all expand:  our problem horizon, opportunity horizon, and growth horizon.

When we can’t see past our problems, our problem horizon is limited.  At those times, you can believe that there is nothing on the other side of a problem or situation.

Sometimes, we just can’t see any opportunities.  Our opportunity horizon is too small, too close.  There seems to be no options, no possibility, no opportunities.  At the same time, others are seeing an opportunity everywhere.  The difference is their opportunity horizon.

And there are times when we just don’t believe we can grow and change.  Our change horizon is too small.  Maybe you tell yourself that “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.”  But in reality, we are ever-changing and ever-growing.  The question is only on how intentional we can be about that growth.  Do we embrace change or run from it?  Do we see our place of growth, or hide from it?

Learn more about your 3 horizons.  And then learn 5 steps to expanding and extending your horizons.