Only Control What You Can

Tools To Thrive Series

Control what you can.Isn’t it interesting how much time people spend trying to control what they can’t control, and how little time we spend trying to control what we can control?

Imagine what would happen if we could flip that.  What if we spent our time trying to control what we CAN control.  And what if we released the rest?

There are really only 3 things that you can truly control.  After that, you are wasting your time and energy.  And you will likely frustrate yourself and others.

This week, as we add another tool to the toolbox, let’s look at the 3 A’s you can control.

Tools of Thriving Series
Introduction
Thought Awareness

Thought Awareness

Tools to Thrive Series

Tool to thrive:  Thought AwarenessThe human mind is amazing.  It is capable of so much.  Thoughts that lead to great works of art, inventions, beautiful buildings, great literature, and everyday life.  Thoughts can also lead to destruction, pain, hurt, and anguish.  All from the same mind.

Your mind and my mind does one thing all day long:  it creates thoughts.  Some are helpful.  Others, not so much.

The fact that the mind creates these thoughts is not a problem.  The fact that we forget we are thinking, that IS a problem.  Because then we confuse a thought with reality.  And we act as if that thought is real.

The first tool of thriving is Thought Awareness.  It is always within your grasp.  But it is a tool many people fail to use.

Let’s talk about how to use Thought Awareness to thrive.

Tools of Thriving Series
Introduction

Your Thrive Toolbox

Tools To Thrive Series

Your Thrive Toolbox.Having the right tool can make ALL the difference.  Ever tried to drive a screw with a hammer?  I have.  It didn’t go so well.

A few years back, I was changing out some faucets.  After stripping the skin off my knuckles and muttering a few choice words, I decided there HAD to be a tool that would help me get those faucets loose.

Turns out there was!  Once I had the tool, everything was easier.

The other day, as I was taking my morning walk with Ziggy (my dog), it occurred to me that there were some tools that help you to thrive.  You might need these tools in your “thrive toolbox.”

Some are mindset shifts.  Others are processes.  And others are exercises.  They all help you build toward a thriving life.

This week, we launch into a new series on these Thriving Tools.  What they are.  How to use them.  How they help you to thrive.

Listen below.

How To Accept AND Excel

How to accept what is and start growing toward what could be.In my latest book, Thrive Principles, one of my strategies is Accepting What Is.  Which has caused some readers to wonder how that fits into my ideas about constantly growing and changing.

They are not mutually opposed.  Accepting What Is creates a beginning point, a starting line.  From there, you can move toward who you want to be.  You can build a life of meaning and purpose.

Many people struggle with where they are.  But where we are is just that, our current spot.  Not a permanent place, but a starting point.

This week, I discuss how to both Accept What Is AND plot a growth course to become the person you want to be.  Make your impact with both sides of the equation.

3 Ways You Complicate Your Life

3 ways we complicate our life.Wouldn’t it make sense if we just made things easy, direct, and effective?

We don’t.  We tend to complicate things.  Repeatedly.

Life is already a challenge many days.  So why do we make it harder on ourselves?  Sometimes, it is mental blocks.  Sometimes, it is reaction.  Sometimes, we let our emotions run the show.

This week, I discuss 3 ways you likely complicate your life.  I know, because I fall into those same traps many times.

The first step is understanding the traps.  The second step is avoiding those traps.

Listen in to discover 3 ways you complicate your life. . . and how to avoid those traps.

Are You a WHY or a HOW Person?

Are You A How Or Why Person?I was madly taking notes at a conference a couple of months back.  This guy beside me was taking no notes.  I was impressed with someone who could remember all the details needed.  The conference was about setting up social media, blogs, and other technical elements of launching a program.

At the break, I turned to him and chatted.  I asked him what he did, and what he was hoping to get out of the conference.  He shared.  I asked him how it was going so far.  For the rest of the break, he told me “WHY this won’t work for me.”

Huh.  I was spending the conference asking “HOW can I get this implemented as quickly as possible?”  I was puzzled.  Why was he doubting, seeing WHY it would not work, and I was scrambling to figure out HOW to do it.

And I paused.  Because I have done the exact same thing as my seat neighbor.  Plenty of times, I was hearing great ideas, but only fixated on why it would NOT work.  In fact, my wife called me on being a NO person years ago.  And I am trying to reform.

In many areas, hopefully more and more, I am a HOW person.  What about you?  Where are you a WHY person?  Where could you be more of a HOW person?

Listen to the podcast below for more on what I mean and how to do it.

Revolutionary Habits, Evolutionary Habits

Thriving Habits Series

Over the last few weeks, we’ve focused on habits as a path to your thriving life.  If you missed any of the weeks, the links are noted below.

Your revolutionary habits and your evolutionary habits.Today, we wrap up the series by noting the difference between two types of habits:  revolutionary habits and evolutionary habits.

Let’s say you are currently not exercising, but decide to start.  You decide to take up jogging.  That is revolutionary.  You are making a 180 degree turn and doing something completely different.

But let’s say you have been jogging for awhile — long enough to call it “running.”  And you decide to add in some resistance training (you might call it “weight lifting”).  That is an evolutionary habit.  You are pivoting your exercise habit to a wider array.

Big changes come from revolutionary habits.  But they tend to be spread out.  You can’t take on a new revolutionary habit every week.  Evolutionary habits are more about fine-tuning and constantly improving.  You may be shifting habits in evolutionary ways day after day.

What are the Revolutionary Habits you need to make?  What are the Evolutionary Habits you need to shift?

Listen to the podcast below for more understanding and clarity — and how to do it!

Habit Series:
You Become Your Habits
Habit Sticking
Habiting Your Goals
LinchPin Habits
Thought Habits

Thought Habits

Thriving Habits Series

For the last few weeks, we’ve been talking habits.  What they are, how they form who you are, how you make them stick, how to turn your goals into habits, and finding your “linchpin habits.”

Your thoughts are habits.This week, I want to draw your attention to your thoughts.  Really, I want to draw attention to the fact that your thinking is also habitual.  Not all of your thoughts.  But how you think and many of the thoughts are really habits.

Those thought habits can either keep you stuck or push you along, depending on the habits.

Do you notice that you think the same way, over and over? Or perhaps you notice you think the same thoughts over and over.  Those are thought habits.

Once those habits start, they become invisible.  Your thoughts keep following the same pathway (in fact, the same neuronal pathway).

Thought habits only change when they are seen as habits.  Let’s make those thoughts thriving thoughts!

Listen below for how your thoughts are habits and what to do.

Habit Series:
You Become Your Habits
Habit Sticking
Habiting Your Goals
LinchPin Habits

Linchpin Habits

Thriving Habits Series

Find your Linchpin Habit.A single habit can be tough, either to make or break.  But what if you could make one habit and it multiplied into other habits?  What if there is a linchpin habit for you that sets others in motion?

The fact is, we all have linchpin habits.  The question is whether they are working for or against you.  Many people have bad linchpin habits.  The habit of watching the game with the guys that leads to overeating and over drinking, for example.

If you want to move in the other directions, toward useful habits, find your linchpin habit in that direction.

Discover your linchpin habit in today’s podcast.  Listen below.

Habit Series:
You Become Your Habits
Habit Sticking
Habiting Your Goals