3 Ways You Complicate Your Life

3 ways we complicate our life.Wouldn’t it make sense if we just made things easy, direct, and effective?

We don’t.  We tend to complicate things.  Repeatedly.

Life is already a challenge many days.  So why do we make it harder on ourselves?  Sometimes, it is mental blocks.  Sometimes, it is reaction.  Sometimes, we let our emotions run the show.

This week, I discuss 3 ways you likely complicate your life.  I know, because I fall into those same traps many times.

The first step is understanding the traps.  The second step is avoiding those traps.

Listen in to discover 3 ways you complicate your life. . . and how to avoid those traps.

Are You a WHY or a HOW Person?

Are You A How Or Why Person?I was madly taking notes at a conference a couple of months back.  This guy beside me was taking no notes.  I was impressed with someone who could remember all the details needed.  The conference was about setting up social media, blogs, and other technical elements of launching a program.

At the break, I turned to him and chatted.  I asked him what he did, and what he was hoping to get out of the conference.  He shared.  I asked him how it was going so far.  For the rest of the break, he told me “WHY this won’t work for me.”

Huh.  I was spending the conference asking “HOW can I get this implemented as quickly as possible?”  I was puzzled.  Why was he doubting, seeing WHY it would not work, and I was scrambling to figure out HOW to do it.

And I paused.  Because I have done the exact same thing as my seat neighbor.  Plenty of times, I was hearing great ideas, but only fixated on why it would NOT work.  In fact, my wife called me on being a NO person years ago.  And I am trying to reform.

In many areas, hopefully more and more, I am a HOW person.  What about you?  Where are you a WHY person?  Where could you be more of a HOW person?

Listen to the podcast below for more on what I mean and how to do it.

Revolutionary Habits, Evolutionary Habits

Thriving Habits Series

Over the last few weeks, we’ve focused on habits as a path to your thriving life.  If you missed any of the weeks, the links are noted below.

Your revolutionary habits and your evolutionary habits.Today, we wrap up the series by noting the difference between two types of habits:  revolutionary habits and evolutionary habits.

Let’s say you are currently not exercising, but decide to start.  You decide to take up jogging.  That is revolutionary.  You are making a 180 degree turn and doing something completely different.

But let’s say you have been jogging for awhile — long enough to call it “running.”  And you decide to add in some resistance training (you might call it “weight lifting”).  That is an evolutionary habit.  You are pivoting your exercise habit to a wider array.

Big changes come from revolutionary habits.  But they tend to be spread out.  You can’t take on a new revolutionary habit every week.  Evolutionary habits are more about fine-tuning and constantly improving.  You may be shifting habits in evolutionary ways day after day.

What are the Revolutionary Habits you need to make?  What are the Evolutionary Habits you need to shift?

Listen to the podcast below for more understanding and clarity — and how to do it!

Habit Series:
You Become Your Habits
Habit Sticking
Habiting Your Goals
LinchPin Habits
Thought Habits

Thought Habits

Thriving Habits Series

For the last few weeks, we’ve been talking habits.  What they are, how they form who you are, how you make them stick, how to turn your goals into habits, and finding your “linchpin habits.”

Your thoughts are habits.This week, I want to draw your attention to your thoughts.  Really, I want to draw attention to the fact that your thinking is also habitual.  Not all of your thoughts.  But how you think and many of the thoughts are really habits.

Those thought habits can either keep you stuck or push you along, depending on the habits.

Do you notice that you think the same way, over and over? Or perhaps you notice you think the same thoughts over and over.  Those are thought habits.

Once those habits start, they become invisible.  Your thoughts keep following the same pathway (in fact, the same neuronal pathway).

Thought habits only change when they are seen as habits.  Let’s make those thoughts thriving thoughts!

Listen below for how your thoughts are habits and what to do.

Habit Series:
You Become Your Habits
Habit Sticking
Habiting Your Goals
LinchPin Habits

Linchpin Habits

Thriving Habits Series

Find your Linchpin Habit.A single habit can be tough, either to make or break.  But what if you could make one habit and it multiplied into other habits?  What if there is a linchpin habit for you that sets others in motion?

The fact is, we all have linchpin habits.  The question is whether they are working for or against you.  Many people have bad linchpin habits.  The habit of watching the game with the guys that leads to overeating and over drinking, for example.

If you want to move in the other directions, toward useful habits, find your linchpin habit in that direction.

Discover your linchpin habit in today’s podcast.  Listen below.

Habit Series:
You Become Your Habits
Habit Sticking
Habiting Your Goals

Habit Sticking

Thriving Habits Series

How to make habits stick.Last week, we started a series on habits.  Your life is, in many ways, built on a series of habits.  Some are good.  Some get in your way.

It always seems to me that we form bad habits so much easier than good habits!  And these aren’t the habits we want to “stick.”

Which raises the question of how to make those good habits stick.  How do you start a habit and keep it going?

If you are a “New Years Resolutions” kind of person, you may notice how few of those habits make it far into the New Year.  I’ve noticed the packed gym in January is deserted before the end of February.  Healthy foods begin to be replaced by snacks fairly quickly.  Running shoes never quite get broken in.

Is it a lost cause?

Should we just give up on those good habits?

Considering how much of life is actually habits, it is important to find ways of building habits and keeping habits.  This is the skill of making habits stick.

Let’s talk about making those habits stick!

Habit Series:
You Become Your Habits

You Become Your Habits

Thriving Habit Series

You become your habits.For a long time, habits seemed to be a useless topic to me.  Got a bad habit?  Change it.  Need a good habit?  Build it.

But the more I reflect, the more I realize how much of life is really about habits.  More than that, I have noticed how hard those bad habits are to break.  And how hard those good habits are to build.

So I started paying more attention to my habits.  I started studying habits.

My first observation:  the vast majority of daily life runs on habits.  Habits of what you do to get ready in the morning, habits of how you get to work and where you park, habits of how you work, what you do after work, bedtime, etc.  Sure, there are choices all day long.  But in the background:  habits.

Some habits just help you run your day.  Some help your life.  Others get in the way.  And in the end, you become your habits.  For good AND bad.

This week, we start a new series on habits:  what they are, how we form them, how we make them stick, and how we build them out.

This week, let’s talk about habiting.

“Commit!”

"Commit," my friend called to me in the surf.It happened long ago, in what feels like another life.  And the story I tell is absolutely true (as far as I absolutely remember it happening this way!).  I promise accuracy, as far as my memory is capable.

Early in my college life, my rather foolish young man’s brain thought it made sense to drive to the beach, toward a pending hurricane. . . and surf!  I will readily admit that if my kids checked in with me about their plans, I would urge them to reconsider.  And likely knowing this would also be true in my case, I did not check in with my parents.

Not surprisingly, we were able to find a good room for cheap.  It would appear that all the traffic we saw going the other way, as we headed to the coast, were those leaving behind rooms.

In my own defense, this was in the day when people would ride out a storm, proudly buying an “I survived Hurricane ______” t-shirt.

I don’t have a t-shirt, but I did learn a lesson.  I apply it every single day, as I strive to thrive.

Can I tell you my little story?  Listen below. . .

(I mentioned my new book.  Please Check It Out HERE!)

What’s Your Center Point?

What's your focus point, your center point, in a dizzying world?It’s a dizzying world, disorienting and jarring.  And every day, you have to make decisions about how to live your life.  What is your primary focus point?  How do you orient your life?

In workshops, I have asked this same question.  People begin to name their priorities:  family, happiness, reputation, respect, or even profit.  Does that provide a moment-by-moment re-orientation?

Nope.

The other day, I was on a crazy, spinny ride with my daughter.  I told her, “Keep your eyes focused on the middle, right in the center.”  In the middle of the ride, I did just the opposite, looking to my side.

I was immediately dizzy.  But as soon as I turned my focus back to the center, the middle point, my focus came back.  The dizziness fell away.

In this dizzying world, what is your center point?  I’ll tell you mine. . .