Eggs, Balls, And Turtles

Raising Thriving Children Series

Raising thriving children.  Are they eggs or balls?  Lessons from baby turtles. . .Summer has flown by!  Here we are, already at Labor Day in the States.  That kind of marks the end of summer for many.  Most schools are back in session and schedules start to be a wee bit more important.  Structure returns.

And parenting may be ratcheted up just a bit.

It’s a great time to be thinking some about your hopes and goals of your parenting.  I’m guessing that your hope is NOT to be the rescuer for life.  Maybe more like coaching from the sidelines while the kids run their plays.

Or maybe like volunteer turtle patrols.

Know what I mean?

If not, maybe a listen to this week’s podcast will clarify for you.  Remember, there are two models of viewing kids:  Eggs or Balls.  I’m leaning toward balls.

Let’s think about it in this week’s podcast, below.

Raising Thriving Children Series
Introduction

Raising Thriving Children

Raising Thriving Children Series

Raising thriving children. A new series on parenting resilient kids.If you are a parent, you know that hope/fear.  You hope to raise a wonderful human being, and you fear making a mistake on the way.

This week, we begin a series on raising thriving children.

During this series, we will look at the goals of parenting, the limits of parenting, and what a parent can do to help a child learn to thrive.  Thriving is not an innate skill.  It is learned.

But it can also be lost in the shuffle of life.

I believe there are two paradigms of parenting:  children are like eggs or children are like balls.

Since eggs can shatter, they must be protected and insulated.  Balls, on the other hand, bounce.

Which model do you see in your own life?

(By the way, if you missed it, I challenged our common understanding of self-confidence just last week.  You can learn about that by CLICKING HERE.)

Listen below for the two theories of parenting and an introduction to this new series.

Finding Your Confidence

Tools To Thrive Series

The truth about self confidence.  How to find it.  How to build it.  How to have it.Confidence.  We all want to feel it.  We are in a culture dedicated to the importance of strong self-confidence.  And yet, it always seems out of grasp.

Why is that?

Because we want confidence to be “there,” already present.  We want it to be a preset of living.  You know, just an innate part of you.

But it isn’t.

If you have self-confidence that you can do something — regardless of preparation, training, knowledge, or skill — that is false self-confidence.  And it will fail at the first moment of challenge.

Which is the innate problem in our current model of raising “self-confident children” (and, by the way, next week is the start of a series on Raising Thriving Children).

And it is why we keep hoping to feel confidence, first, rather than having to build it as we go.

Listen to this week’s podcast for the Thriving Tool of Confidence — and we will be wrapping up the Thriving Tool Series with this tool.

Tools of Thriving Series
Introduction
Thought Awareness
Only Control What You Can

The Responsibility Formula
The Perspective Shift
Your Built-In Importance Indicator
The Importance Matrix
The Appreciation Approach
A Thriving Breath
Systemize Your Life
Using Mindfulness To Thrive

Systemize Your Life

Tools To Thrive Series

Systemize Your LifeGoals are great.  Except they give you no path to get there.  And goals can interfere with your happiness.  If you can’t get there, you feel frustrated.  Once you do get there, you can feel let down, not sure what to do next.

But you need goals, right?

Well, they are a starting point.

But what if you put “systems” in place to move you toward your goal?

Some people believe they need habits that move them forward.  But habits are formed through systems you create to move you forward toward some goal.

Want to write a book?  Don’t focus on the book every day.  Focus on writing every day.  Set aside 15 minutes, maybe an hour, and write.  Or decide to write 500 words per day.  That is your system.  Follow it, and soon you have a book.  But then there is a system that moves you forward, past the goal.

Make sense?

Listen to this week’s podcast for more info on “systeming” your life.

 

Tools of Thriving Series
Introduction
Thought Awareness
Only Control What You Can

The Responsibility Formula
The Perspective Shift
Your Built-In Importance Indicator
The Importance Matrix
The Appreciation Approach
A Thriving Breath

The Importance Matrix

Tools To Thrive Series

The Importance MatrixDo you find yourself chasing after all of those “urgent” tasks, only to discover that they really don’t matter?

President Dwight Eisenhower said, “I have to kinds of problems.  The urgent and the important.  The urgent are not important and the important are never urgent.”

Sometimes, the urgent things ARE important.  They probably get done right then and there.  But then the urgent (but not important) tend to crowd out the important (but not urgent).  For example, those meetings and tasks at work that you take on can seem urgent.  But they might not be important.  On the other hand, relationships with a spouse or children can get pushed to the side because they are not urgent.  Yet they are important.

The sad part is when the important (but not urgent) get shuffled off to the side for so long that they become no longer important.  Broken relationships, hurting spouses — they drift away.

The Eisenhower Box is named for President Eisenhower.  It is a powerful tool in your Thriving Toolbox, as you work to get priorities clarified.

Listen in to learn how to use it in your life.

Tools of Thriving Series
Introduction
Thought Awareness
Only Control What You Can

The Responsibility Formula
The Perspective Shift
Your Built-In Importance Indicator

Your Built-In Importance Indicator

Tools To Thrive Series

Your Built-In Importance IndicatorWouldn’t it be nice if you had a built-in detector that let you know when something is important?  Kind of like a treasure detector to point out when to pay attention and dig in?

Guess what?

You do!

But you probably aren’t using it the way it was designed.  Most people aren’t.  In fact, most people use this indicator as an Avoidance Indicator — using it to AVOID things, even important things.

Used correctly, this built-in indicator will help you decide what is important and what is trivial.  It will also guide your choices.  Used incorrectly, and it will keep you stuck, small, and missing opportunities.

Ready to learn how to use it?  Listen below. . .

 

Tools of Thriving Series
Introduction
Thought Awareness
Only Control What You Can

The Responsibility Formula
The Perspective Shift

Your Thrive Toolbox

Tools To Thrive Series

Your Thrive Toolbox.Having the right tool can make ALL the difference.  Ever tried to drive a screw with a hammer?  I have.  It didn’t go so well.

A few years back, I was changing out some faucets.  After stripping the skin off my knuckles and muttering a few choice words, I decided there HAD to be a tool that would help me get those faucets loose.

Turns out there was!  Once I had the tool, everything was easier.

The other day, as I was taking my morning walk with Ziggy (my dog), it occurred to me that there were some tools that help you to thrive.  You might need these tools in your “thrive toolbox.”

Some are mindset shifts.  Others are processes.  And others are exercises.  They all help you build toward a thriving life.

This week, we launch into a new series on these Thriving Tools.  What they are.  How to use them.  How they help you to thrive.

Listen below.

How To Accept AND Excel

How to accept what is and start growing toward what could be.In my latest book, Thrive Principles, one of my strategies is Accepting What Is.  Which has caused some readers to wonder how that fits into my ideas about constantly growing and changing.

They are not mutually opposed.  Accepting What Is creates a beginning point, a starting line.  From there, you can move toward who you want to be.  You can build a life of meaning and purpose.

Many people struggle with where they are.  But where we are is just that, our current spot.  Not a permanent place, but a starting point.

This week, I discuss how to both Accept What Is AND plot a growth course to become the person you want to be.  Make your impact with both sides of the equation.

Revolutionary Habits, Evolutionary Habits

Thriving Habits Series

Over the last few weeks, we’ve focused on habits as a path to your thriving life.  If you missed any of the weeks, the links are noted below.

Your revolutionary habits and your evolutionary habits.Today, we wrap up the series by noting the difference between two types of habits:  revolutionary habits and evolutionary habits.

Let’s say you are currently not exercising, but decide to start.  You decide to take up jogging.  That is revolutionary.  You are making a 180 degree turn and doing something completely different.

But let’s say you have been jogging for awhile — long enough to call it “running.”  And you decide to add in some resistance training (you might call it “weight lifting”).  That is an evolutionary habit.  You are pivoting your exercise habit to a wider array.

Big changes come from revolutionary habits.  But they tend to be spread out.  You can’t take on a new revolutionary habit every week.  Evolutionary habits are more about fine-tuning and constantly improving.  You may be shifting habits in evolutionary ways day after day.

What are the Revolutionary Habits you need to make?  What are the Evolutionary Habits you need to shift?

Listen to the podcast below for more understanding and clarity — and how to do it!

Habit Series:
You Become Your Habits
Habit Sticking
Habiting Your Goals
LinchPin Habits
Thought Habits